Story Planning Contest I

[Angie]

Plan out a full-length story chapter by chapter, with at least two or three sentences describing each chapter. Give the story a relevant title. Write a fairly detailed sketch of your main character. You may get ideas from the following form:

www.thescriptorium.net/sketch.html

Genre: any
Length: 8-12 approximately equal-length chapters (can include prologue and epilogue if you wish)
End date: TBA
Judge: none

Please only post here with your entries so as not to clutter the thread. If you have questions, PM me or the judge.

[Angie]

I'm going to go ahead and post this before I finish it, and I'll come back and work on it from time to time. . .

This is actually based off of a story that I had started once a long time ago, but I only wrote the prologue, and I got totally flamed for it, so I lost confidence. . . So here goes.

Title: The Basin

Prologue - Begin with vague comments that tell the reader of an aweful beast. Then cut to the first scene where we find the main character in an abandoned building. She is found by one of the few humans left and brought to their haven. However, when they get there, something is going terribly wrong.

Chapter 1 - More vague comments about the aweful beasts. Cut back to the action where the girl's rescuers tell her that the castle, which once belonged to Them, must be under attack. The two men tell her not to worry about it, and take her to a hidden trapdoor in the woods that leads down below the castle. When they get to the bottom, they are in a huge old room that has a walkway suspended around the edges (which is where they are) and floor so far down that they can't see it in the dim light of their flashlights.

Chapter 2 - As she hugs the wall for her fear of heights, she finds something in a crevice in the stone. It is a large golden vial encrusted in jewels and covered in a strange ancient script. Suddenly her foot catches, and she is falling down from the suspended walkway. Looking around, she realized that she could no longer see the flashlight from what must be above her, and in fact, she was in almost complete darkness. Feeling around, she noticed she was in a very large basin.

Chapter 3 - After struggling out of the tub, she wanders into one of the hallways that led out of the huge room, and she eventually comes upon a doorway behind which people were talking. A gruff man and a meak man of much lower rank (Longsworth is his name) are having a conversation about somebody almost breaching the borders, and then they get into an arguement where Longsworth keeps saying how they should worry about it, and the gruff man keeps getting onto him for underestimating their Queen's power.

Chapter 4 - Apparently the men inside have very sensitive senses because they catch her eavesdropping without even opening the door. Longsworth, much less meek than he was with his outranking officer, drags her deeper into the ground to the prisoners' cells. There she talks with the other prisoners in the adjoining cells (they are made of indestructable metal and not bars, so she can't see the others), and she learns that she is the first human they've had down there. This, of course, makes her pray that they can't get to her because she knows that they are Their kind of creatures.

Chapter 5 - She eventually lets herself get to sleep, but when she wakes up, she's not in her cell anymore. In fact, she's flying. She looks up and realizes that a man is holding her up, and they are flying with a dozen other men. He takes her to a bank across from an island, waves his hand to make a path of mud come up from below the water, and brings her to the island. On this journey just described, he tells her that he is with the resistance, and they need a human to prevent the terrible future they foresee.

Chapter 6 - When they are inside the mansion on the island, the man and his companions explain the whole situation and why they need her help.

Chapter 7 -

Chapter 8 -

Chapter 9 -

Epilogue -

Character profile -
Full Name: Andra Darnell
Age: late teens or early twenties
Race: irrelevant
Gender: female
Body Type: average, not athletic or unathletic
Other Physical Features: irrelevant
Important Background: irrelevant except what is in the story; she's lived an average life with nothing extraordinary in it until the events just before the story began
Relationship with other characters: none ATM
General personality: a little frightful, common personality
Hobbies: irrelevant
Positive Traits: no matter how reluctantly, she takes things as they come (what else is there to do in her situation?)
Negative Traits: scaredy cat (to put it bluntly)
Other notes: none ATM

Okay, it's too much of a bother to do that one, so here's the notes I have for myself for my current story (I will make them legible later on). Don't read further if you don't want LUL spoiled for you.

Chapter I ~ write in diary, introduce Richard and mom, make her smile, he gets diary

Chapter II ~ dream (w/ key to open waterfall door, chase) and revelation, quote from first version of story

Chapter III ~ boy reads diary, decides to give her an outlet to a person, flashback to sister incident

Chapter IV ~ force her to write to him, starts with essays, asks mom for help, small breakdown and wants to do it on her own, he makes her write letters to him every week about anything she wants to talk about

Chapter V ~ letters; start very impersonally with one about cooking, introduce new dad and explains Zoey a bit to him, she sinks further inside at the threat, he writes back to tell her that he won’t be able to write back much because school is making him so busy but he still wants her letters

Chapter VI ~ writes letter about school, she thinks he wouldn’t understand, starts thinking and tells herself that maybe it’s not such a good idea to try to change herself

Chapter VII ~ second dream and not much has changed except key is missing, looks through waterfall and mom sees her and beckons her in, looks for key but can’t find it anywhere, work scene

Chapter VIII ~ soon-to-be-dad comes over again, she writes a letter about her mom and the guy

Chapter IX ~ time elapses, made some attempts to step out, but the only thing that seemed to be helping were her letters, and she wasn’t sure they were getting her much closer to talking, but they were nice, tells about how Richard stayed in town to do a home-based college study, prepare for wedding

Chapter X ~ wedding and lots of fun, feels distant, husband’s relatives mostly don’t know about her so they embarrass her with their ignorance, people pull her into line of dancers going in a circle, she is terrified at first, Richard and her mom step in beside her to give her a comfort zone, and she has fun, she later gets mad at herself for not being able to handle strangers

Chapter XI ~ starts thinking about the dream, about her mom, about her sister?, about herself, about what she’s done to isolate herself over the years, decides that only a drastic measure can help her, new chapter here?, climbs into the bathroom, runs to Richard’s backyard, grabs hammer out of tool-chest and therefore wakes him up because it’s right next to his bedroom, he sees the tears in her eyes and follows her back home, she climbs back into her room and starts ripping the wood off the door, mom and step-dad wakes up as she hammers it over the makeshift door to the bathroom over her dresser, gives her mom all her old diaries, they didn’t contain any analyzations about her mutism because it was just a normal part of life for her, she hoped they would let her mom get to know her own daughter more

Chapter XII ~ starts thinking about how the slow progress seems to be doing nothing but make it worse, her mother and step-father and Richard seem happy so she puts on a front, she realizes that it’s not enough to want it for herself, she gives up hope of ever speaking and being normal again, thinks about fictional stories of human strength and believes them only fiction, prays for her sister Sue’s forgiveness, he comes to see her, she takes out notebook and starts writing him a letter then and there about what she had become determined to do and her weaknesses and that she’s given up, refuses to let him read it there so she mails it

Chapter XIII ~ two days later she reads “Secret Life of Bees” and reads part about hot pink house, self-hate because of the guilt she felt because of the lives she affected negatively, decides to not give up because she’s hurting everybody around her, realizes that’s enough, takes her diary into the backyard and burns it

Chapter XIV ~ Richard comes over to talk about the letter, her skirt gets caught on the bedpost so she can’t get to the door in time, knows it’s the perfect opportunity to talk but chickens out, knocking stops, gets unstuck, gets to the door just as he’s walking toward the street, runs after him, sees a car zoom around corner, yells and pulls him out of the way just in time

Chapter XV/Epilogue ~ hysterical, stutters a little at first didn’t think she could do it for herself so she had to force her to do it for others, and his name just came out when she saw that car, she feels slightly bad because she didn’t know that she would have done that before in the same situation, he couldn’t be more proud, tells her of her great strength, she tells him of how many times she wanted to quit, he says that everyone wants to quit sometimes but that doesn’t make you any weaker, she says that’s the happiest she’s ever been because she’s alive now, he wants to help her live, he proposes, insert profound quote somewhere around here, mom comes home, ends with “Mom, I know it’s felt like it, but you didn’t lose both your daughters in the accident. I’m living!”

Cheese.

[scarecrow]

I'll work on this in parts too.

Title: The Female Standup and the Ouiblette of Black Demons

Premise: Santiago Deraz wishes that his job at a local mini-megastore was more exciting. Little does he know that the disappearance of the life-size standup of Scarlett Johansen outside the store has lead him on a quest to defend the world (or at least Brody's Convenience Mini-Megamart) from a pack of pint-sized terrorizers.

Character Profile
Name: Santiago Deraz
Age: 14
Race: Mestizo
Gender: Male
Body Type: Very wiry
Other Important Physical Features: Greasy Hair, Freckles, Large Doleful Eyes
Important Background: From a very large and poor family. Santiago is the only person in his family to make it to high school.
General Personality: Sycophantic, worried, a dreamer.
Hobbies: None
Positive Traits: A very hard worker, Santiago is resourceful and smart, and always eager to please.
Negative Traits: A little too concerned with others opinion of him, Santiago will always bend over backwards to please others, even to his own detriment.

Chapter 1 - Santiago Deraz is so in trouble. His boss Brody is furious over the disappearance of the Scarlett Johansen standup that's gone missing in front of the store, and he's adamant about it being Santiago's fault, despite the fact that he was home on sick leave. Because of his inability to predict the theft, Santiago is given the punishment of taking down every item from every shelf in the store, and then (here's the tricky part) putting them back exactly as they were before. Santiago, only too glad that his boss didn't fire him for his lack of psychic abilities, is only too happy to do this. His family needs the money, and they are so proud of him for getting a job that pays more than his father's does (his dad cuts lawns). Santiago still wishes that he could have a job that he actually liked, or at least one that was somewhat interesting.

Chapter 2 - In a basement in Citpyrc, the Order of the Black Demons is going about business as usual: they are in the midst of their tri-annual sacrifice of the ugliest young in the village. The Black Demons, however, tired with their incessant attempts at copulation to create young to sacrifice, have been unable to produce any new offspring this year, so they have to settle for Ostaf, a bulky pre-teen demon with an acne problem, the obvious choice for the ugliest child. However, just before they can jab him to death with the ceremonial twigs, the most gargantuan, most hideous thing they've ever seen falls out of the sky (what later turns out to be a life-size standup of Scarlett Johansen). As they prepare to examine it, the ginormous structure goes back into the sky from whence it came, only this time taking Ostaf with it.

Chapter 3 - A very picky, very rich regular customer is outraged when her son finds a toy beside the standup outside the store, especially when the toy curses her son for putting it in his mouth and tells her that she reeks something awful. Brody apologizes to his customer, and again blames Santiago, who can't help but agree that if he had forseen that a toy would appear beside the newly returned Scarlett standup and that the little boy would try to eat it they wouldn't be in this mess. Santiago decides to keep the rude talkative toy to remind him to practice his clairvoyance or there will be consequences (like the fact that he now has to pay Brody for the privilege of babysitting his spoiled daughter for the weekend). Brody tells Santiago that he will be in charge of the store next week while he and his family take a tour on a cruise ship, and that if Santiago messes up anything while he's gone, he's fired.

Chapter 4 - The Order has assembled a small, magical task force to ascertain just who has committed the act of war of stealing a sacrifice. After much deliberation (most of which is just a ploy by the task force to convince The Order that more money will accelerate the process), the task force "discover" that the monster that stole Ostaf was a legendary creature from the lowliest edges of the Alterna-verse that needed to feast on demons to stay alive. The task force convince the Order that, due to the reports of the odd tufts of yellow strings from its head and its swollen mammary glands and its sickly white complexion, the creature is desperately weak, and they perhaps have a chance of recovering Ostaf from the belly of the beast before he is thoroughly digested. The task force is assigned with the further task of whipping up a magical way of getting to the creature (for lots more money, of course). The Order in the meantime goes about selecting the best of its soldiers to lead a scouting mission first, both to test the task force's spell and to determine just what would be best to destroy the wretched creature.

Chapter 5 - It's Sunday, and Santiago is returning home plumb tired from his babysitting (Jasmine insisted to ride him horseback-style all the while, complete with reigns and whip). After a congratulatory fawing-over for his work initiative by his mother (Santiago neglected to tell her that he's the one paying Brody for the privilege to babysit) and some jealous sniping by his father (Cecilio is envious of Santiago's "cushy" job), Santiago has some alone time in his room with the toy the kid was trying to eat. Ignoring the toy's flithy language and it's constant threats to kill Santiago and everyone he ever knew, Santiago is impressed at the detail of it, and tries prying at it's various orifices to find out where the batteries go. He remembers why he kept the toy in the first place, and says a silent prayer to God to give him the psychic talents Brody wants him to have so he can do his job even before it needs to be done. He especially needs it for this week's solo-stint at the mini-megamart. Again he wishes his job were less banal, and also asks God for something exciting to happen in his life.

Chapter 6 - Black Demon Ops, the new special division of the best soldiers created by the Order, is ready for their scouting mission. Well, perhaps second best soldiers would be more exact, as the original members of the Black Demon Ops were decapitated as soon as they put on the test transport amulets the task force created. However, with a little more elbow grease and a lot more funds, the task forces believes they've rectified their initial error. Black Demon Ops, outfitted for the battle ahead, all put on their amulets tentatively. The amulets work, and the troop finds themselves in a strange new world, and before them is their enemy, the ginormous beast, who they see really is sick, so sick that it doesn't even try to run from them as they approach it. But before they can do much more, they are assaulted by a constant barrage of fast moving creatures that make a thundering noise as they whizz by (cars), crushing them one by one. Only one injured soldier has the good sense to use the amulet to flee back to Citpyrc, and uses his dying breath to give the Order a report of the terror of what happened (and to tell his mother that she was lucky he'd never gotten the chance to kill her like he'd always wanted to).

Chapter 7 - Santiago's entire immediate family, to his infinite chagrin, passes by for a visit at work, where his mother embarrasses him with her constant fawning over him, so proud that he's running the store all by himself, and his father keeps pointing out malaciously that if he had Santiago's job he'd be working much harder (like cleaning that blackish debris in front of the Scarlett Johansen standup, for instance). Santiago's mom insists that he show the family just how exciting his job is, but the only thing Santiago can show is just how he sweeps up the aforementioned debris (which he notices seems a bit similar to the little toy he's keeping as a memento to be more psychic). His mother is mollified, but his brothers and his father keep teasing him about it. Not for the first or last time, he wishes his job was more exciting. And he seems to get his wish, because after he ushers his family out and goes to throw out the debris in the trash, he comes back to find Ostaf wailing about how the beast has gone to attack his people again, and while he has no idea what the little toy is talking about, he is devastated that the standup has gone missing again.

Chapter 8 - In Citpyrc, the Black Demons have come to the Central Ouiblette en masse to celebrate their favorite type of holiday: war. The Darkest Daemon, the ceremonial title given to the current leader of the Black Demons, has come out for the tradition of giving a rousing speech to send off the troops. It's particularly good this year, and the old crone is hitting all the right notes to make his people smile: merciless beating, unspeakable carnage, unrelenting torture, killing babies, and all the other things in this vein that his people like to hear. The troops then assemble, the largest attack force ever put together in the history of Citpyrc, and the elderly Darkest Daemon stands before them, pointing his feeble hand upward with a final cry of "To Victory!", the crowd erupting in a burst of applause and cheers. Then the beast descends upon them suddenly, killing the Darkest Daemon and some of the troops and bystanders, injuring hundreds more. It is a scene of despair and chaos as they scoop up the injured to use as ammunition for the catapults, and the remaining troops launch their frenzied, uncoordinated attacks with their clubs and fists, but all to no avail. Meanwhile, the fearful crowd is running rampant, killing the stragglers underfoot in their attempts not to be killed by the beast. After a few minutes of this, the beast retreats back into the sky unharmed, leaving behind the now massacred city of Citpyrc.

Chapter 9 -

Chapter 10 -

Chapter 11 -

Epilogue -