Life For Death (WARNING: CONTAINS SWEARING)

[Brokenhearts]

WARNING!!!! CONTAINS SWEARING!!!!! and the title is a workin progress

What is his problem? What is my problem? I should know so much better than to have anything to do with him.
He’s everything I’m against. A show off, a player of females hearts, arrogant, pervert- everything I hate! I’ve always written against people like that. In my poems and stories it’s always men like that that loose out. That get put down by the women. It’s always the sweet guys that get the girl.
So why can’t I follow my heroine’s examples and not feel anything for him!
Oh stop looking at him, Lena! You’ll just encourage him.
Anthony Franklin MacGregor- a$$hole to put it simply.
He’s half scottish, half english. He has a Scottish accent though. His eyes are bright, piercing, green, and his hair is blacker than anything I’ve ever seen. It’s deffonetly dyed though. His features are carefully chistled to handsome perfection- in the most traditional way possible. Slim mouth, slim nose, raised, unobvious cheek bones. His face is more… interesting, lets say, that striking. He is handsome though- but nothing would make him stand out all that much. Too much of the usual casual, charming handsomeness surrounding him. I guess that’s what most girls are attracted to, even if he is a total- you get the idea.
I’ve known him forever because he’s my older brother’s best friend. Kostos, my brother, is twenty one, Anthony is almost twenty and in his first year of collage- though for what I’m not sure. Kostos is in the second year of that collage.
Me? I’m eightteen, and an aspiring writer. I’ve had some work published, mostly my poems, and my realist stories, my fantisies don’t seem to be doing as well. I keep going over them and trying to make them better. Each time I do, the publishers give me better comments. They just won’t publish them.
Oh shit! HE’S COMING OVER! Go away Nat- if you know what’s good for you. Nat’s his nick name. I gave it to him at the age of five, hating calling him Ant.
“Hey Lena,” he smiles at me. He uses that smile on girls he wants in bed. Go to hell you fucker. Not gonna work on this girl.
“Hi,” I reply iceily, glaring at him, then turning back to my note pad trying to describe a dragon as viviedly as I can see it in my mind.
“How you been?” he asks, sitting with me.
Don’t you dare use the stupid Joey esq. voice on me. Ain’t gonna work mate- not in a million years. “Fine,” I snap back, doodling a scetch of the dragon in the corner. Maybe I should do children’s books insted, you know, the ones with massive pictures? That’d work- no describing.
“Well I’ve been fine too,” he grins at me, “thanks for asking.”
“I didn’t.”
“I was being sarcastic.”
“Go be sarcastic else where- I’m trying to write a novel.”
He laughs. I’ll admit it, I like his laugh. His laugh and his smile- best things about him. But that’s it. “You should be trying to pass your A level, dear child.”
I’m concentrating on my drawing- he’d better not piss me off too much. We’re in bloody star bucks for christ sake. And my A level’s are next week- I should be rest. Not trying to get some stupid book in for just after the exams. Stupid publishers. I think I’ll answer him now.
I look up at him, my eyes narrow. Nah, let him rot for all I fucking care.
“Ok then,” he says, getting uncomfortable now. Thank the fucking lord, maybe he’ll go away. Like now…
Maybe not then…
“Kostos’s pissed off with you by the way,” he adds casually, “he said he told you spercifically not to go to the Adems’s Mansion.”
I shrug. I get on with their daughter. She’s nothing like the rest of her family. She crazy, fun to be around, and just a plain- yeah, she’s one of my best friends.
“Nat,” I say putting my pad down, and looking at him properly, an elbow on my knee, head on my fist, he knows as well as me that when I do that- he’s in deep shit. “You know that I never listen to Kostos… ever! So why don’t you run along back to your beloved leader, or go find some poor helpless girl to shag, mmm?” I pick up my pad cross my knees and concentrate on the dragon that’s been giving me hell for the past few days.
“You really don’t-”
“And anyway,” I add, not looking up, “did he know that there was gonna be some kinda explosion there or something?”
Nat didn’t answer. He just seemed to choke on air or something.
“Jesus Lena,” he complains at last, “can you be nice just for once?”
“Not to a person like you I wouldn’t,” I reply distractedly, scetching out the flame issuing from my Dragon (his name shall be… Pete, like my uncle’s dog- that loves me so much).
He sighs angrily and gets up.
Thank you God! Maybe you exist after all.
“Hey Lena,” he says, just before finishing his coffee in a gulp. Nasty habit. “Did you know you stick your tongue out when you concentrate hard?”
I look up at him sharply. Most people comment on it when they see it, which isn’t often, as it’s only a little bit. I frown confused.
“No?” he asks, “did you know that you plaay with you’re lip ring when you get aggitated?”
What was this trying to prove? Was this actually going… any where?
“Thought you should know.”
“Funny,” I mutter as he walks away, as though he’s achieved something.
The a$$hole.
Is it just me, or is he really the most annoying thing that has ever walked the planet. Well, I guess it should be explained why I hate him so much. I can’t complain about him if I don’t have a reason.
The evidence.
When I was four, and he was six, he pushed me off my swing, stole my teddy, ripped off it’s head and said it was all my fault.
On my seventh birthday, he put cake in hair, and rubbed chocolate on my face. He told me it was an improvement.
When I was eleven, he pushed me in the muddy pond. Twice.
Thirteen, he tried to touch me up. Then said there was nothing to touch up when I slapped him and kicked his groin. Oh, and I knew there was something there, because I heard one of his friends mention about the size of them, and asked him how it felt. His reation was a moan coz he was still on the floor clutching what was left of his manhood.
Fifteen, he got pissed at his seventeenth birthday pLenay. I was sent over by my mum to make sure that Kostos didn’t get too shattered, and he starts making out with me in front of my boyfriend. Who turned roound and ssaid, “wanna shag her?” Nat mumbled incoherently, so he added, “go on, I aint bothered.” Broke up with that bastad the next day.
And then last year, he had written his own ereotic book, and sent it in under my name. They sent it back to my address saying that it was nor at all for children. I swear to God I commited murder. Weird how I still see him wandering around the place.
That’s my evidence.
Oh, and he’s shagged everyone from the year below me upwards while he was in school. And believe me, he made time.
I had to crash at his and Kostos’s for a little while when dad chucked me out.
I heard sound that night that I never want to hear ever again! Even if they’re coming from my mouth. Never!

ONE WEEK LATER

I HATE EXAMS! I am sitting in starbucks- again (why do I come here? Oh yeah, Ville, my beloved best friend works here so I get money off, and yes that is his real name before you ask), complaining to Ville Dixon, Becky Adems, Tommy Laurance and Lucia Holmes about my stupid blood exams and why the hell did I pick psycology?
“Because,” says Lucia, stealing some of my cookie, “you love analysing people.”
“That would be Kostos,” I reply simply, “and not in that way- I beg of you.”
They roll their eyes. Kostos and all his friends are the same. Need I say more?
“Well you always got a good grade in it,” Becky tells me, blowing out the smoke from her mouth.
“And it is something to fall back on,” adds Tommy.
“Yeah yeah yeah,” I mumble, grabbing Becky’s ciggie and putting it out with my tumb. “I hate exams.”
“As much as you hate Nat?” asks Lucia cheekily.
I look up at her, eyes narrowing. “Fuck off,” I tell her. “I don’t hate anything more than Anthony MacGregor.”
They roll their eyes.
“I swear to God!” I exclaim.
“Ah,” puts in Ville, “you don’t believe in God.”
“Neither will you if you don’t shut you’re fucking mouth,” I tell him testily, I am not in a good mood- I’m pretty sure I have failed my exams.”
Ville is a… I dunno what he is exactly. Doesn’t seem to believe in organised religion. Doesn’t believe in organised anything. I’ve been to his mouse often enough. But he does believe in God. Surprisingly.
“Does he know?” asks Becky, trying to light up again, only I snatch the light out of her hand.
“I hope so!” I reply, “last time he talked to me I wasn’t exactly the nicest of people to him.”
“This will make such a cute story,” dreams Tommy. This guy lives in a world of dreams. Look up romantic- you see a picture of Tommy I swear. Maybe not in the official dictionary, but in my one att home there is.
“You are joking,” I tell him, knowing he means the usual, boy messes up girls life, girl and boy hate each other, then girl and boy realise they only hate each other because of this hidden desire to actually shag each other senseless, and then they get together happily ever after. That’s very boring, and not going to happen this time. It really is not.
“Hey,” says a familliar voice from behind me, making me jump.
I look up startled and see none other that the dreaded Anthony him self. The a$$hole.
“Oh Jesus fucking Christ,” I mutter, holding my head.
“You know me so well,” he grins, “only people who get to me closest call me that.”
“Nat!” I complain, “you get outta my face right now, before I do a repeat of what happened when you were fifteen.” Hinting at the fact that I beat the shit outta him.
He winces.
HA! Still hurts him. Serves him right. a$$hole.
“Ok fine!” he replies, “I just wanted to say thhat you gotta come back to mine and Kostos’s tonight.”
He turns round and walks out.
I look around at my friends who are looking equally bemused.
“Back in a second,” I tell them, getting up and following him out. He’s waiting outside, trying to light a ciggarette. Is it just me, or is every trying to commit suicide with smoke?
I snatch the ciggarette and light out of his hands.
“Hey-”
I drop the light and crush it under my heel. I look up and glare at him. I can see the paket in his jeans poket. I reach out and stick my hand in it.
“Not in public-”
I grab the packet- of ciggarettes. Lets get one thing straight first. I open it and break them all up into little bits.
“Why do I have to go back to your’s and Kostos’s tonight?” I demand.
He raises an eye brow at. He’s trying to piss me off, I can tell. He loves it.
“Why can’t you just trust me for once?” he sighs, “stop questioning everything Lena, and just trust me. And your brother,” he adds as an after thought. He turns to leave, but I catch hold of his arm and swing him round to face me.
“Tell me now or I swear I will go home.”
He’s actually looking scared at that. Why the hell doesn’t he want me to go home?! Home should be the safest place in the world. Right? He’s looking down like he can’t face me. What is going on?!
“I can’t,” he mutters finally, being serious, he looks up at me- well down at me. What ever, he look from the floor to my face. “Lena, please,” he begs, “please just trust me. I’m begging you here.”
I study his green eyes closely. I’ve never seen them so serious. What is going on.
“I don’t trust you,” I snap, “I know you too well. It’s probably a prank.”
I turn away from him.
“Lena!” he complains, calling my name. Jesus, this sounds serious. He is being serious for once in his life. How desperate can this be? This is me we’re talking about- insegnificate, wanna be writer me! “Will you please just listen to me. If I tell you, our lives would be at stake.”
“What ever,” I reply roling my eyes. Turning back round. I would go his and Kostos’s, but just to get what the hell is going on. I hate being left in the dark. Ville would propably start laughing like a lunatic. Saying that Nat was just trying to get me into bed. Trying and failing miserably.
I’m suddenly thrown back wards, and something explodes from inside the coffee shop. I’m litterally thrown into Nat, and onto the pavement. Nat grabs hold of my waist, cursing like crazy and flips us over so he’s on top of my, making sure I keep my head down. His hands are over his ears.
I feel another wave of heat, like I did for the first explosion. But we’re not flying. I can hear it though.
Oh my God! Becky! Tommy! Lucia! Ville! This can’t be happening. This just can’t!
I throw Nat off me, and try to get up, and run towards the building again. But Nat has got a hold of me tightly, pulling me closer to him.
“No Lena,” he whispers, “you can’t. It’s too dangerous.”
“I can and will! Let me go MacGregor!”
“No Lena.” His voice is strangely calm and collected.
Without warning tears spill down my cheeks. My friends…
What could have happened to them. They have to be alive. They are I know it! They won’t have left me. Ville and Becky promised to always be there for me. Oh please, God if you’re there let them be ok! Ket them all be ok. I dunno what I’ll do with out them if they’re not.
I’m clinging to Nat, banging his chest to let me go, crying insessantly. He just holds me tighter. Oh fuck it, he’s not gonna let me go. Ville…
“They attacked,” I hear Nat say, in a low serious voice, into a miniture telaphone he has to his ear, “out of no where. No warning no nothing… Yes, she’s fine. She’s here with me. I’ll try and get her to a safe area… thank you sir… will do.” He hung up. He tried to pull me along with him.
“No!” I shout, “I have to find them!”
“Lena, you have to listen to me. I think they’ll be all right, they were sitting towards the front, the bombs were towards the back. They’ll just be injered.”
“I have to find them.”
“You’re life is in danger, don’t you understand that! That bomb was for you! We have to get outta here.”
“Why?”
“Just come on. Not here.”
I look back at the building. People are already on telephones calling 999, some are running into the building trying to help and find people. I can see people limping out, covered in blood admittedly, but relatively ok.
I swollow hard. The only one I’m really really worried about is Lucia, she has mild asthsma. They’re all tough, they if people had servived, they would. They won’t leave me. They wouldn’t.
I nod sightly, and look up at him.
He’s looking at my head worriedly.
“I’ll get you cleaned up at home. Kostos’s gonna have a fit I swear.”
I sniff. What the hell is going on? Why does Nat and Kostos know so much? Why is my life in danger? I’m just a writer, a student writer at that. Not even a good one. What could anyone want to do with me? I’m a no body.
Right…

[Brokenhearts]

Lena Joyce Williams. Anthony had liked her for years. She untouchable though. Best friend’s younger sisters were big no-nos. Especially when the best friend knew very well what he was capable of and what he had done to women in the past. It was fine if was a stranger. If it was family, there was no way in hell he was gonna get near her.
But she was in his arm, calming down, hugging him to her- but pushing him away at the same time. She had always been messed up like that. Hadn’t helped that her father was an ego-maniac and refused to hug her, or pay her any attention because she wanted to be a writer, and insisted on piercing herself and getting the odd tatoo when she felt like it.
She only had her eye brow done… twice. And her lip, towards the right. Three times on both ear lobes. Three times on her right ear cuff… five on her left… other than that she didn’t have that many.
She had a rose stem tatooed round her right wrist with a black rose blooming towards the side. An eagle on her left shoulder blade. An arabian style star on the inside of her right hip. A celtic long-life sighn just under neth her coller bone and toward her shoulder, right side.
He could see it from the angle that he was looking at her. But that just made her different. She was stronger than most women, but all the women he had ever dated had been strong and indapendant.
Her chocolate brown hair flapped slightly in the breeze, and it shimmered a strangely buleish purple colour. Her big eyes were deep brown, and very intense. That’s what she got for being such a writer. She wasn’t tall, but not particullarly short either, standing at about 5 ft 5 or there abouts. Her features very taken very much from her mother, and rather gyspish (though their names were greek, as their father was half greek) Full sensual lips, slim, finely darn nose, angled eyes, with wide irises. She was an unusual beauty.
He pulled her away from the wrackage site of the coffee shop. He had to get her away from there. Her friend’s would probably be fine- he hoped. He had met them a few times. They hadn’t been particularly nice to him. Then again, they had heard stories of him taking the piss outta her as a child. They were her friends and heart warmingly, feircely loyal too.
“Lena,” he urged, having to pull her, “you’re not being helpfull.”
“I have to see if they’re all right.”
“If you don’t hurry your sexy lil ass up, you won’t be alive to.” He had said that out loud… if she took it seriously he’d be in some serious shit.
“You’re such a jackass,” she mumbled, “who would want to kill me? I’m a nobody.”
‘You have no idea, girly,’ he thought miserably, ‘you are possibly one of the most important people in the whole world… you just don’t know it yet.’
She did speed up after that.
It took the half an hour to get back to his flat. She knew the codes and everything, so she punched the numbers in quickly, and he used the key to open the door.
Kostos and him had a pretty good flat. They were both rich in background, plus the other money they were earning. It was large, with three bedrooms, and Lena often had to stay there, large living room, seperate kitchen- large as well. And two bathrooms. Everything was modern and set on two floors. The bedrooms and one bathroom up stairs, everything else on the down stairs.
Lena immediately flopped to the couch, and turned on the tv, and out it onto the BBC sky new 24. She wanted to see if there was anything on the bombings. It was everywhere.
She scanned the pictures for her friends. Swollowing hard when ever she saw pictures of bodies being dragged out.
Mean while Anthony grabbed his phone, calling head quarters. They had to know she was safe at him home. Nothing could touch her there.
After a quick hurried convosation with the boss, he sat with her. He sighed deeply, looking a little embaressed.
“What’s going on?” she asked quietly, as the news reader went on about terrorists, and how the gonvernment weren’t saying anything, but people suspected Al-Quaida had been involved.
“I can’t tell you yet.”
“Don’t give me that shit, Nat,” she sighed, “that bomb was ment to kill me. I’m alive, well and comfortable with out so much as a scratch. And all those people are hurt and dead instead of me. So don’t tell me you can’t tell me bullshit.”
“I can’t. I really- shit…” he sat up straight staring athead of him. “I gotta call Kostos, he’ll be panicing like crazy!”
She laughed slightly. “You sound like his boyfriend.”
“Rick’s actually not that panicy.”
“I know. I’ve met him enough times. You sound like Vince- his last boyfriend.”
“The one before Cara?”
She nodded.
“Oh him,” he shuddered, he hated that boyfriend of Kostos’s. “I gotta call him.”
“I wanna talk to him.”
“Ok ok, fine.”
Kostos, Lena’s brother, was a bisexual. He had just as many boyfriends as girl friends. And he played them both as much as he liked. Though he seemed pretty serious about Rick. Who was just plain gay.
“Hey bi-guy,” greeted Anthony, joking.
“Where the hell is my sister,” he demanded, coldly. He was protective over her like she was his own life. That was art of the reason for why she was so important and why she was going to be killed if she wasn’t careful.
Anthony sighed. “She’s here, with me.”
‘Does he want to talk to me?’ mouthed Lena. He nodded, and she held out her hand to for the phone.
Instead of handing her the phone, he took hold of her hand with his and carried on talking to his friend.
“She’s gonna want to know what’s happening,” Anthony warned calmly, as Lena let out a gasp of horror, and tried to snatch her hand back, and grab the phone off him, “she’s been quizzing me since we go back.”
“Well that’s not surprising, what have you told her.”
“Just that the bomb was ment to kill her.”
“Oh great… That’s what you’rea really ment to tell and overly curious eighteen year old. She’s gonna kill me.”
“If they don’t get to her first.”
“Shut up MacGregor. Just keep her sorry butt safe untill I get home.”
“Sir yes sir,” he said.
“And don’t take that seriously.”
It took Anthony a few seconds to process what had been said. Then he understood what he usually would have gotten in an instant.
“Wouldn’t dream of it,” he said sincerely, he had a hold of Lena’s head at arms’ length by then. She had given up, and just sat in moody quiet for a few seconds. “Here’s your beloved sister, I’ll see you later.”
He handed the phone to Lena, and just snatched it out of his hand and stLenaed talking rapidly in their mother’s language. It was an old version of Romanian- they were half Romani gypsy.
Anthony had learnt it, but not when they spoke it. They had perfect accent, almost as thick as any true Romani gypsy. And they spoke it too fast.
He wandered into the kitchen and flicked the kettle on. He needed something stronger than coffee, but that was all they had in the house. He had ment to go out and get some kind of alcohol that day, but things happened and he got side tracked.
He stuck his head out of the door, and saw Lena calming down as she relaxed on the sofa. She even had a small smile on her lips. As kids, he had been able to do that too, as they grew up, the teasing he did to her, hurt her more and more. Now they almost hated each other.
It was true people said about little boys and little girls. A little boys teases a little girls if he likes her. Same goes as you grow up, on the feeling for that little girl grows up with that little boy. Now Nat had a feeling he was possibly in love with her. He sighed and walked back into the kitchen, her sweet, excitable giggles eachoing through the house. It was ashame he had ruined everyhing when he was younger. It was ashame he took his unrequited love out on women from his missions, sleeping with them like he didn’t care. She was well aware of it too…
It was ashame that she would never know how he felt for her.

I just hung up from Kostos’s call. I guess I just needed to hear his voice. Even as kids he’s always been able to cheer me up and make me laugh. He hasn’t explained anyhing to me yet. But he will. He promised, and he never breaks a promise. To anyone, least of all his own sister. Me.
“Tea or coffee?” calls Nat.
Wandered where he got to. Usual English person. Panick brakes out, turn on a pot of tea. I think it’s a cute habit.
I did not just say that about Nat- hell no! He’s a complete man-whore! Nothing to do with me if I had it my way. The only reason I know him is because of my brother. If Kostos had never been around (but I’m glad he is), that I would have nothing to do with Nat. I know much better. I wouldn’t be missing out on anything.
Absolutely nothing
Not a thing.
Nope.
“What?” I call back, waking up from my dreams.
“Tea or coffee?”
God I need something stronger than mere caffine. I don’t normally drink alcohol in any circumstance. Don’t like the taste. I don’t like the feel either.
But this is different. I’ve just been attacked.
“Got anything stronger?”
My friends could be hurt. Oh God. I need to see them. NOW!
I get up, not quite hearing Nat’s reply. It’s like a buzzing noise.
Tears are blurring my eye sight and I run to the door. I grab my shoes and try to pull them on.
What the h-!
Now Nat has a hold of me. He holding me tightly. I cannot move. At all! I didn’t know he was so strong.
But I have to see my friends! I have to see if they’re ok! Becky… Lucia… you guys have to be fine!
“Let me go!” I struggle against him, getting weaker and weaker, “I have to… I have to… my friends…”
“Shhh,” he says soothingly, holding me tightly, putting his chin on my shoulder, mouth right ext to my ear. His grip is tight round my waist, and locked on my stomach. “It’s all right. Lena, it’s fine. Just trust me.”
“How would you know!” I scream, “they might be dead!”
Oh God… they might be dead. All of them. I can’t stand this. If they’re dead… I haven’t said that out loud yet. Now I have.
I brake down. My body is all limp, like I’m a ragdoll. My chin is on my chest and tears are going down my face, I can feel them. My hands are in tight fists, trying to keep party of me strong.
This isn’t fair. This can’t be happening to me. Nothing like this ever happens to me.
That what people say in stories, we’re just such and such and then they turn out to be really important.
But in this case it’s true. I’m eightteen- have been since October. I’m ment to be doing my A levels, and I’m writing novels for some extra money, because I don’t want to have to rely on my rents forever.
Nat picks me up, bridal style. He rocks me very slightly as he carries me back to the sofa. Even as he sits with me on the sofa, holding my body to him, instead of pushing him away, I put my head on his coller bone. I need someone close to me now. I hate to admit that at any time. But things are changing, and this is hopefully a very rare time that I need to.
He holds me to him, leaning in the crook of the sofa. His left arm around my body, his right aross my lap.
I lock our fingers together, and hide my face in his chest, trying to calm down.
“It’s not fair,” I mumble.
“I know, honey,” he mutters, soothingly, “life sucks. But it’ll get better, it always does.”
“Not nessicarily.”
I sigh deeply. Nothing’s going to be the same ever again.
I can feel it.
I suddenly realise what I’m doing. I JUST LAY DOWN ON THE BASTARD! He’s gonna get some freak ideas, I know he is. I push my self away from him, and sit as far away from is as humanely posssible on the sofa, glaring at him. I push all remnance of tears aside. I am never doing that again.
“Why can’t you please just give ame a chance?” he complains.
“Because,” I snarl, “you’re a womaniser, and to my knowledge, you’re stringing along about three girls.”
“Five actually-” I cock an eye brow at him, “that’s not the point. You’ve known me long enough-”
“To know that you are a total freaking man-whore.” He’s about to protest again. What is his problem?! He just digs a deeper hole for himself. “What ever MacGregor, you’re an a$$, that’s it.”
I turn back to the tv, and change the channel to some random movie to take my mind off what has just happened. I tend to need to do that. But now more than ever. I need to just block everything out. A mindless film about… Leagally blonde!… TWO!! You are joking me… wow I’m desperate. But what ever. Nat’s asking me if I want tea- see what I mean?! Anything happens, anyone want tea? Honestly.
I’ll just ignore him. He’s the most annoing git in the world, so I will not waste my time on him.
“Lena…” he murmurs trying to come closer. I look at him, I know my eyes are on fire, I can feel it. He backs up slightly, swollowing hard. Good. I thought he’d never learns. He’s getting up mumbling something about getting coffee.
“Voldka if you have any!” I call after him, looking back at Reace Withspoon come to the counter to find out that her dog is gay. Man I feel sorry for that poor lil pooch, having to dress up like that… I shudder thinking what would happen if I ever did that to my kitten, Tigger.
‘I’ll never do that to Tigger,’ I think to myself quietly.
“Here,” says Nat, cutting into my thoughts, handing me a shot glass of voldka. I take him casting him a short glance, then look back at the screen again. I swollow it quickly, and make a face at the burning sensation it gives me as it slide down my throat. I hate alcohol, but desperate times call for desperate measures. I can feel my body loosening up slightly.
I sigh contentedly, and close my eyes. That small shot of alcohol has made me able to loosen up. I think I should go to sleep… maybe this’ll turn out to be one big bad dream… I’ll find Ville slapping my face to wake me up, telling me I must be on something. Then Becky’ll tell him I’ve just had alot of work… yeah… that’s what’ll happen…
Someone touches my shoulder, and I jump a foot in the air, backing away from the person touching my shoulder. I look up to see Rick smiling sympathetically at me.
“Hey babes,” he says, sitting down next to me, hugging me tightly, “you ok?”
I hug him back, feeling slightly better. I like Rick, he’s the best boy/girl friend my brother has had a relationship with. I liked Cara, but when she found out that Kostos was bi, she dropped him like a brick. I hate her now. She so… I won’t think about that now. I can’t.
“I’m tired,” I tell him, as I think this.
“Really?” he asks, “I just woke you up! Nat told me you’ve been asleep for a few hours.”
I frown, and look out the window. Sure enough, the sun is setting. I look even more confused. Why didn’t Nat wake me up? He likes scaring the shit outta me, he know how much I hate it when people wake me up so suddenly. Only Kostos can get away with it, and Rick for the moment, he doesn’t know me all that well.
“Where’s Nat?”
“He went to head quarters, MI6 is pretty upset with him. He pretty much failed his easiest mission.”
I blink rapidly. Ok… WHAT?! Did he just say what I think he said?!
“Say that again Rick,” I tell him, “and say it slowly.”
He gives me a strange look, then seems to decide that I must have some form of concussion.
“He went,” he pauses, I nod, “to head quaters,” pause, nod, “MI6 is pretty upset,” pause, nod, “with him,” pause, nod, “because he,” pause, nod, “he failed his easiest misson.”
I repeat the words in my head. Over and over… does that mean what I think-
“Honey I’m home!” sings Nat, walking in joyfully, as Kostos follows him, hitting him over the head, and greets Rick with a peak on the lips.
I look round at all the men in the room. I am totally dumb founded. I may have just made the biggest descovery about Nat and Kostos… and probably Rick to, ever. Rick basically telling me.
“Why is MI6 angry with you?” I ask quietly, watcing their faces.
Nat’s eyes are widening, in shock. Ok, so I was not ment to know that. I look at Kostos. I’m really not ment to know this… he’s looking pretty angry, and confused. What is happening! I do not GET IT!
“Never mind that, honey,” Kostos says, glaring at Rick for a moment, and coming, “you must be-”
“Kostie…” I interupt sweetly. I always use that name when I want to annoy him, or get something out of him, “if you don’t tell them, I swear to God I’ll spill about the-”
“OK OK!” he screams, he knows what I’ll do if he don’t tell them. I’ve used it against him since i was six, and I can still get away with it. I love eves dropping… “me, Rick and Nat are spies. Yes even Nat. You happy?”
He… I… Nat… WHAT THE FUCKING HELL?! WHAT HAPPENED?! I just blink at them, face blank, all random thoughts are running through my head. Like: how? when? Why? And, for some strange reason, I want Ice cream…

[Brokenhearts]

Ok, so I usually have a strange craving for ice cream when I’m totally confused and I don’t know what to say. I eyes dart between all of them. Nat’s consered, for some reason, blue eyes. Kostos’s woody brown, and Rick careing green.
These guys… they’re…
No! My brain cannot handle this information right now. Ville, Becky, Lucia and Tommy are in hospital. I have to concentrate on that.
“I need-”
“Ahem…” Nat’s standing next to me, he does move fast! Plus I was looking down. He’s holding out a container of hagan daz, and a spoon. Why does this boy have to know me so well? I hate him…
I snatch it out of his hand. “Thanks.” I sit down and stare out the window, opening the container, and eating some of the ice cream slowly.
Five minutes later, the guys surround me, Kostos with his arm around me, Nat on my other side, examining my face, and Rick sitting in front of me. He just looks concerned.
“I’m confused…” I mutter angrily, glaring at the ice cream instead. “How… When… Why…” I look up at them, all of them.
Kostos can’t look at me. Oh great. There’ more sectrets. I thought he told me everything! I was the one he told when he first thought he was gay, then it turned out to be bi. I was the one he turned to when he thought mum was gonna kill him for breaking something. I always sheltered him if I had to. We always have been close. Why didn’t he tell me about this.
I look at Rick. He has a very hinest face, and he keep playing with his wavy blonde hair. He can’t look at me either.
So, I look at Nat. He is the only one who can look at me. How comes?
He takes a deep breath, and ruffles his black hair. Oh dear lord… this is gonna take a while…
“Ok, first of all, we were sworn to secrecy that’s why Kostoos couldn’t tell you. Other wise you’d be the first to know about our jobs.” I nod, watching his eyes carefully. He can’t lie if you look him in the eye. Not to me anyway. “We’ve been studying for being a spy since we were about fifteen. I dunno hwo, guess they looked at tests, and PE records and stuff like that. I dunno, but they interviewed some of us, and made us sighn a contract of secrecy. Like anyone would believe but hey.” He’s panicy. Guess this is serious. “Ok, the point is we’re spies, proper spies, we graduated early, coz we got bumped up several classes. And then II was given the assighnment to look after you.”
“Look after-”
He over rides me… ok then, I will keep quiet… “I kinda didn’t want it, coz of… emotional reasons shall we say? I know you on a personal level, as they put it. Plus your a pain in the ass, and trouble follows you every where. Then the bomb happened, and now everything’s just gone…” he paused, “BANG! and now… we’ll… I’ll put it simply. You’re life is in danger, MI6 ain’t happy, and Kostos will kill as soon as he get’s the chance.”
“He’s not joking, Lena,” growlls Kostos, making me look at him, “I have a lisence to kill, and I will use it.”
“Ooooh kaay…” I say slowly, “you can just smell the testosterone in this room. Now, why am I wanted?” I look around expectantly. Their faces are telling me it’s gonna be a long night…

She had not taken the news well. The look on her face was litterally screaming out for ice cream as soon as she looked down and seemed to think things through. Nat sighed, and walked to the fidge, grabbed the hagan daz, grabbed a spoon, and the minute she opened her mouth he had it ready.
He explained everything as best he could- he could never lie to her. That was the problem with her. About facts, he could never lie.
Then she asked the dreaded question: “Why am I wanted?”
They looked at each other and swollowed. She rolled her eyes and went back to her ice cream, and glared out side their window at the city spread out below them.
“You told me that you’re spies, and work for the MII6, you can tell me why I’m wanted dead, can’t you.”
Nat glanced at Kostos. He could see him suddering, and his eyes close as she uttered the word dead. He would hate it if his baby sister died. He damned himself every day for being so close to her. Because of the conection, she position was made so much worse.
“I’ll explain,” sighed Kostos, “it’s my fault…” He took a deep breath and looked at Lena as best he could. “I’m a pretty top spy now, and made some enemies. Some how, some massive mob, like the Mafia (only it’s a purely white American one), got information on me, after me and Nat ruined their branches in the most of the meditaranian. They can’t get to be directly, because of my training, contacts and protection. You on the other hand… you’re an open target. You were going to be chosen for spy work, but I told them to lay off you.
“So the Mob, they’re too unorigional to think up anything…” he went off into a slight rant about stupid thick red neck americans, mostly in Greek, until Nat and Rick smacked him. He looked up startled, and carried on. “They found out about you, annd they’re trying to get to you through me. Then they found something else out about us.”
There was a slight pause. She nodded encouragingly, trying to coax it out of him.
His mouth stiffened, he growled in his throat, and shook his head. They all knew that there was no way in Hell, Heaven or Earth that he was going to tell her the other thing.
He got up, and walked into his room, and slammed the door shut. Everyone winced. Even Lena knew he was cursing himself. She just did not know why yet.
Rick sighed heavily, and pushed his light frame up from the floor. “I’ll go see how he is,” he sighed, and walked into Kostos’s room. Leaving Nat and Lena in the room alone.
“I’m going to bed,” she sighed, taking the ice cream and spoon with her.
Nat knew as well as everyone else how much she hated being around him. It still hurt him to a certain extent, but he hhad gotten used to it. That did not mean he liked it.
“You sure?” he asked.
She glared at him. “Coarse I’m sure.”
She walked away, and headed towards her/the guest room.
“Stop playing with your lip ring!” he called out to her as she opened the door.