Post by Ethan on Jan 4, 2008 15:30:59 GMT -5
K...I got ANOTHER new project going, but this one I think I'll actually finish, because I can relate to the main character, and have taken a basic idea from my personal experiences.
I'll give a plot outline, if someone wants it, but for now, I'll post the bit I have written. I really need critiquing (although, be nice or I may hang myself)
k, here we go! aren't you excited?! lol
Prologue: The End
The silence was deafening, and unbearable. I was alone in my room. My parents had gone out for the night. Which was for the best, I didn’t need them interrupting me. This was my justice; this was my end. As I held the cold steel of the revolver in my hand, I knew it was what I had to do. I deserved this, not because what I did was wrong. My intentions were good, and things just got…out of hand. I deserve this because of the lives that got ruined because of my actions. I deserve this because I lost.
I pride myself on my intellect, as you will find as I reflect upon the past few months of my life. I didn’t think anyone could outsmart me; I didn’t think I could be wrong; I didn’t think I could lose, but I did.
So many lives were lost, but I only felt remorse for one. She didn’t deserve this. She was innocent. Caught in the crossfire, her life was destroyed. A single tear rolled down my cheek. The tear was for her; the tear was for Emily.
Why did I do it? Why did I hatch the scheme that would eventually ruin my life? Why couldn’t I just leave things be? I have only one answer, and although it may sound cliché, it is the truth. The reason I did it all was love. It may not seem like much, but love is the force that drives the world.
I double-checked the chambers, all were full, but I’d only need one. Holding the gun to my head, I thought not of what lay ahead of me, I thought only about love. Love is the most powerful force in the universe; this is an unquestionable statement. Love can change lives, change people, and change the world.
Chapter 1:The Boyfriend
I walked up the path to Emily’s house. This was the first time we had seen each other in a year. Emily had gone off to school in Paris on a foreign exchange program. She had been my best friend for as long as I could remember, but I had realized something in the time we spent apart. I loved her.
It wasn’t apparent to me until she was out of my life. The pain I felt because I wasn’t able to see her every day was unbearable. I wanted her to know, and everyday I anticipated her arrival, I thought of what I’d say, I thought it all out to every little detail. But now, approaching her door, I anxiety rose in my stomach, and a metallic taste filled my mouth. I was about to be sick.
It was the first day of the new school, and, although Emily had gotten back a week earlier, I waited until today to see her. I thought it would be easier, since I walked her to school everyday, my visit would be normal. And then I could bring the subject up, once I was comfortable enough. I knocked on the oak door of the large, and sophisticated house.
Emily’s parents had never really liked me. They were upper class, and my family was of a lower status than them. We weren’t poor, and we got by, but barely. The economical difference made her parents dislike me, but Emily didn’t care. She saw me for who I was. She saw me as her best friend, and I hoped she could see me as her boyfriend.
The door opened, and I was immediately clasped into a hug. “Isaac!” she squealed, “I missed you so much! Why didn’t you come visit earlier?” she asked as she released me from her arms.
Still dazed from the sudden embrace, I stood dumbly, searching for my mind. “I’ve been really busy with work, they had me pulling double shifts.”
She smiled, “You still work at that grocery store?”
I smiled back, almost getting lost in her big blue eyes. “No, I quit after you left. There was no reason for me to be there after that. I got a job with my dad doing construction.”
“Oh, man. That must be hard on you physically.” She laughed.
I had been a scrawny runt when she left; wiry and short. But I hit my growth spurt a few months after her departure, and now stood at six feet. The construction job, as well has biweekly trips to the gym had aided in my filling out physically.
“Well, I’ve grown, so it hasn’t been too hard,” I laughed, wondering if she had even noticed my change in appearance.
“Oh my God!” she squealed looking me up and down, “I didn’t even notice it! You look amazing”
I blushed, “You’re just being polite,” I said stupidly, kicking myself inside.
“No I’m not!” She said loudly. Emily always had been perky and enthusiastic, despite some of the troubles she had in her life. She moved closer to me, and her perfume filled my nostrils, and my knees felt weak.
She put her hands on my upper body for a better perspective because the baggy sweater I was wearing at the time didn’t do me justice. Her touch was soft.
“Oh, man. You’ve really grown, Isaac.”
Unintentionally, my eyes wondered to her body. The tight jeans and tank top she had on her small, but developed frame, showed her growth as well. She caught me looking, and looked up into my eyes from where she stood at 5’5.
She gave a laid back giggle, “Isaac?”
“Yeah?” I responded, my mind elsewhere.
“You’re checking me out,” she laughed.
My cheeks flushed again, and I averted my gaze. “Sorry,” I said shyly. All of a sudden she intimidated me.
“It’s ok,” she smiled.
“You’ve grown too.” I said dumbly.
She giggled again, “So I’ve been told. I don’t really like it, though.”
“Why not?” I asked, truly confused, “You look amazing.”
“No I don’t,” she said quietly, “and guy’s keep hitting on me.”
“And the downside is…?”
“They just want me for my looks. They want me because they think I’m pretty.”
I looked at her face: large eyes, pouted lips, small nose, and a fair complexion sitting under long, light brown hair.
“You are pretty,” I said without thinking.
“Shut up,” she laughed.
“Sorry.”
There was an awkward pause as the blue of her eyes stared into the green of mine. “We should probably get going to school,” I smiled weakly, breaking the connection of our eyes.
“I’ll be out in a second,” she smiled, “I need to grab a jacket, it’s kind of chilly out here.”
“Try to hurry, we’re going to be late,” I teased.
“I’ll try.”
She closed the door and I stood waiting. I kicked myself.
Why couldn’t I have been smoother? In my head, our conversation had gone a lot better. Gathering my thoughts, I ran my fingers through my short black hair and waited for Emily to come back.
At this point I feel I should tell you a bit about Emily. On the outside she was happy and ditzy, but this is merely a defense mechanism. She felt that if people knew the real her, they wouldn’t like her. The Emily I know, the Emily I loved, was brilliant. She was very passionate about what she believed in, and listening to her talk was one of the greatest things in the world, to me. She saw things in a darker light, but was still optimistic and wanted to believe there was good in the world. I admired this, seeing as the world hadn’t been kind to her.
Her parents were only her parents by law. She had been adopted when she was ten years old, after a drunk driver had killed both of her parents in a car accident. More tragedy lies within the date of this event. Her parents had been driving home, with her in the back seat, from Emily’s tenth birthday dinner. The opposing car sideswiped them on the driver’s side of the compact car. Her father was killed instantly, and her mother died in the hospital shortly after emergency vehicles came to their aid. Emily had been unscathed, except for a gash on her inner thigh when debris from the car shot to the back seat and cut her. This gash turned into a scar; a permanent reminder of the worst day of her life.
She came back out the door. I stood for a moment, lost in thought, and was snapped out of it when she said, “Umm…can we go now?”
“Yeah, sorry,” I apologized again.
We started off down the street, walking in silence. Our bodies were only inches away from touching. I was painfully aware that I wasn’t saying anything, and we would be approaching the school soon. I needed to start talking. I needed to tell her I loved her. I opened my mouth, but no words came out. She broke the silence.
“So, Isaac,” she started, “aren’t you excited for our senior year?”
I sighed, and adopted a sarcastic tone, “Oh so excited.”
She giggled, “Come on, it won’t be that bad. You will have all the girls hitting on you, now that you’re all sexy,” she smiled.
I laughed nervously; this was it, time to say it. “I don’t want all the girls hitting on me, though.”
Emily cocked her head, “Why not?”
“Because…never mind.”
I was having second thoughts about telling her. What if she didn’t feel the same? The pangs of rejection would hurt me so much.
“Tell me,” she looked me in the eyes.
It felt as if she was peering into my soul. I had a feeling she already knew why, but Emily’s curiosity knew no bounds. She always needed confirmation for her thoughts.
“Let’s not tug at that thread,” I smiled.
Her voice was quiet and soft, but hit me hard, “I don’t want to tug at that thread. Please, just unravel the truth for me.”
Fuck.
This wasn’t fair. She made me feel guilty. I admired her manipulative abilities, though. She’d make a great interrogator.
She spoke again, “why don’t you want all of the girls hitting on you?
She obviously knew this was serious when I tried to not answer the question.
I thought about lying, but I knew she’d see through it. Emily knew me too well.
“I don’t want the girls at school hitting on me because…I don’t want to be with any of them.”
“…Who do you want to be with?” She asked, pushing the subject. I wished she would just drop it.
I looked at my shoes, and focused on my laces. “You.”
She said nothing. I didn’t want there to be an awkward silence, so I went on. “I had this whole speech thought out in my head, but I can’t remember it anymore.” This was going horribly. “All I can remember is that…is that I love you.”
More awkward silence, then she spoke, “Oh, that complicates things.”
Fuck.
That wasn’t the response I had anticipated.
“Why does it complicate things?” I asked.
That was walking into the proverbial minefield.
“Because, never mind.” She said.
My turn.
“Tell me.”
“Well, I do have feelings for you,” my hoped rose, “but,” the crashed back down, “I have a boyfriend.”
“What?” I asked, confused, “you’ve only been back a week.”
“He asked me out the day I got back. He goes to our school. He’s really sweet and funny, and I really like him.”
“Oh…” I said quietly.
“I’m sorry.” She said again, “I hope we can still be friends.”
“Yeah, of course.”
She smiled weakly, but took a small step farther away from me. It was subtle, but I noticed it.
I hated myself at this moment. Why did I have to wait? Why didn’t I meet her at the airport and tell her then?
We were on school grounds now, and the noise of teens talking and laughing in front of the building.
“I’d like you to meet him,” she said quietly, “I think you two would get along.”
Big mistake.
“Yeah, sure, I bet we’ll be good friends.”
Chapter 2: The First Conflict
Emily told me to meet her in front of the school at lunch. She said she’d bring Jack, her boyfriend, so we could officially meet. I saw her walk out of the school doors, followed by a guy, who I assumed was Jack.
He was my height, with a large nose, small eyes, and a tanned complexion. He looked like he took great pride in his appearance, and he walked with an arrogant air about him that told me I wasn’t going to like him already.
This was not hypocrisy on my part. I was arrogant only with my intelligence, which was justifiable, seeing as my IQ was way above the norm. Jack, however, was arrogant in general. He had a snobby face that screamed, “I’m better than all of you.” With people like him, I’d simply stump them verbally, and knock them off of their pedestals, but I wouldn’t be able to this time. If I was a jerk to her boyfriend, Emily would be mad at me, and I did not want that.
“Isaac, this is Jack,” she motioned towards the guy.
“Hello,” I faked interest, and held out my hand. He didn’t take it.
“Hey,” he replied, not putting as much effort into the greeting as I did.
Emily looked uncomfortably at the two of us. “Oh, man, I forgot my jacket in my locker,” she said, “I’ll be right back.”
“I’ll go with you,” both Jack and I announced at once. We shot each other subtly nasty looks.
“No, I’ll go myself. This will give you two a chance to talk and become friends,” she smiled and left.
I turned to Jack. “So…” I said uncomfortably.
“What’s with you and my girlfriend?” he said suddenly, throwing me off guard.
“She’s my best friend,” I said simply, shrugging.
He paused in thought, “Just don’t mess anything up,” he said threateningly.
He was jealous of me, as I would later come to that conclusion. It was the fact that I was Emily’s best friend. I knew her better than he did. I understood who she was, and how she thought, and Jack was jealous of that understanding. Ironically, I was jealous of him as well. I was jealous of what he had. I was jealous that he had Emily.
“Why would I mess anything up?” I asked innocently.
I wish I could ‘mess things up’.
He looked glared into my eyes. “Just don’t, ok? Or you’ll be sorry.”
I sighed, there was no point arguing with him, “Fine.”
Emily came back, “So, how are you two getting along?”
Jack grinned and gave a friendly, but painful slap on the back, “Isaac and I are getting along great,” he was so full of shit you could smell it.
Emily gave me a glance, and I put on a fake smile. I didn’t want her to think I was jealous. “I think I’m inviting this kid to my birthday party,” I said, but the sarcasm leaked through, and it looked as though Emily caught it. Jake, however, did not.
“Um…yeah,” she smiled weakly at me, “great. I’m glad you two are getting along. It would have upset me a lot,” she looked at me, “if the two most important guys in my life didn’t like each other.”
“Good thing we do, then,” said Jack.
“Good thing, indeed.” I smiled.
This was the first conflict. Minor, I know, but trust me; it’s the kindling for the fire of this tragedy. Jealousy. It’s the green-eyed monster that lurks in all of us. Bringing out our primal traits, is it that bad? Depending on the dose, jealousy can cause behaviors on each end of the spectrum. Jealousy brings forth violence, and loathing when it is too concentrated. But envy is also passion and desire; you want something somebody else has. Whereas my envy was directed towards the desire to have Emily, Jack’s jealousy was a loathing towards me. Love and envy, hand in hand, a lethal combination
I'll give a plot outline, if someone wants it, but for now, I'll post the bit I have written. I really need critiquing (although, be nice or I may hang myself)
k, here we go! aren't you excited?! lol
Prologue: The End
The silence was deafening, and unbearable. I was alone in my room. My parents had gone out for the night. Which was for the best, I didn’t need them interrupting me. This was my justice; this was my end. As I held the cold steel of the revolver in my hand, I knew it was what I had to do. I deserved this, not because what I did was wrong. My intentions were good, and things just got…out of hand. I deserve this because of the lives that got ruined because of my actions. I deserve this because I lost.
I pride myself on my intellect, as you will find as I reflect upon the past few months of my life. I didn’t think anyone could outsmart me; I didn’t think I could be wrong; I didn’t think I could lose, but I did.
So many lives were lost, but I only felt remorse for one. She didn’t deserve this. She was innocent. Caught in the crossfire, her life was destroyed. A single tear rolled down my cheek. The tear was for her; the tear was for Emily.
Why did I do it? Why did I hatch the scheme that would eventually ruin my life? Why couldn’t I just leave things be? I have only one answer, and although it may sound cliché, it is the truth. The reason I did it all was love. It may not seem like much, but love is the force that drives the world.
I double-checked the chambers, all were full, but I’d only need one. Holding the gun to my head, I thought not of what lay ahead of me, I thought only about love. Love is the most powerful force in the universe; this is an unquestionable statement. Love can change lives, change people, and change the world.
Chapter 1:The Boyfriend
I walked up the path to Emily’s house. This was the first time we had seen each other in a year. Emily had gone off to school in Paris on a foreign exchange program. She had been my best friend for as long as I could remember, but I had realized something in the time we spent apart. I loved her.
It wasn’t apparent to me until she was out of my life. The pain I felt because I wasn’t able to see her every day was unbearable. I wanted her to know, and everyday I anticipated her arrival, I thought of what I’d say, I thought it all out to every little detail. But now, approaching her door, I anxiety rose in my stomach, and a metallic taste filled my mouth. I was about to be sick.
It was the first day of the new school, and, although Emily had gotten back a week earlier, I waited until today to see her. I thought it would be easier, since I walked her to school everyday, my visit would be normal. And then I could bring the subject up, once I was comfortable enough. I knocked on the oak door of the large, and sophisticated house.
Emily’s parents had never really liked me. They were upper class, and my family was of a lower status than them. We weren’t poor, and we got by, but barely. The economical difference made her parents dislike me, but Emily didn’t care. She saw me for who I was. She saw me as her best friend, and I hoped she could see me as her boyfriend.
The door opened, and I was immediately clasped into a hug. “Isaac!” she squealed, “I missed you so much! Why didn’t you come visit earlier?” she asked as she released me from her arms.
Still dazed from the sudden embrace, I stood dumbly, searching for my mind. “I’ve been really busy with work, they had me pulling double shifts.”
She smiled, “You still work at that grocery store?”
I smiled back, almost getting lost in her big blue eyes. “No, I quit after you left. There was no reason for me to be there after that. I got a job with my dad doing construction.”
“Oh, man. That must be hard on you physically.” She laughed.
I had been a scrawny runt when she left; wiry and short. But I hit my growth spurt a few months after her departure, and now stood at six feet. The construction job, as well has biweekly trips to the gym had aided in my filling out physically.
“Well, I’ve grown, so it hasn’t been too hard,” I laughed, wondering if she had even noticed my change in appearance.
“Oh my God!” she squealed looking me up and down, “I didn’t even notice it! You look amazing”
I blushed, “You’re just being polite,” I said stupidly, kicking myself inside.
“No I’m not!” She said loudly. Emily always had been perky and enthusiastic, despite some of the troubles she had in her life. She moved closer to me, and her perfume filled my nostrils, and my knees felt weak.
She put her hands on my upper body for a better perspective because the baggy sweater I was wearing at the time didn’t do me justice. Her touch was soft.
“Oh, man. You’ve really grown, Isaac.”
Unintentionally, my eyes wondered to her body. The tight jeans and tank top she had on her small, but developed frame, showed her growth as well. She caught me looking, and looked up into my eyes from where she stood at 5’5.
She gave a laid back giggle, “Isaac?”
“Yeah?” I responded, my mind elsewhere.
“You’re checking me out,” she laughed.
My cheeks flushed again, and I averted my gaze. “Sorry,” I said shyly. All of a sudden she intimidated me.
“It’s ok,” she smiled.
“You’ve grown too.” I said dumbly.
She giggled again, “So I’ve been told. I don’t really like it, though.”
“Why not?” I asked, truly confused, “You look amazing.”
“No I don’t,” she said quietly, “and guy’s keep hitting on me.”
“And the downside is…?”
“They just want me for my looks. They want me because they think I’m pretty.”
I looked at her face: large eyes, pouted lips, small nose, and a fair complexion sitting under long, light brown hair.
“You are pretty,” I said without thinking.
“Shut up,” she laughed.
“Sorry.”
There was an awkward pause as the blue of her eyes stared into the green of mine. “We should probably get going to school,” I smiled weakly, breaking the connection of our eyes.
“I’ll be out in a second,” she smiled, “I need to grab a jacket, it’s kind of chilly out here.”
“Try to hurry, we’re going to be late,” I teased.
“I’ll try.”
She closed the door and I stood waiting. I kicked myself.
Why couldn’t I have been smoother? In my head, our conversation had gone a lot better. Gathering my thoughts, I ran my fingers through my short black hair and waited for Emily to come back.
At this point I feel I should tell you a bit about Emily. On the outside she was happy and ditzy, but this is merely a defense mechanism. She felt that if people knew the real her, they wouldn’t like her. The Emily I know, the Emily I loved, was brilliant. She was very passionate about what she believed in, and listening to her talk was one of the greatest things in the world, to me. She saw things in a darker light, but was still optimistic and wanted to believe there was good in the world. I admired this, seeing as the world hadn’t been kind to her.
Her parents were only her parents by law. She had been adopted when she was ten years old, after a drunk driver had killed both of her parents in a car accident. More tragedy lies within the date of this event. Her parents had been driving home, with her in the back seat, from Emily’s tenth birthday dinner. The opposing car sideswiped them on the driver’s side of the compact car. Her father was killed instantly, and her mother died in the hospital shortly after emergency vehicles came to their aid. Emily had been unscathed, except for a gash on her inner thigh when debris from the car shot to the back seat and cut her. This gash turned into a scar; a permanent reminder of the worst day of her life.
She came back out the door. I stood for a moment, lost in thought, and was snapped out of it when she said, “Umm…can we go now?”
“Yeah, sorry,” I apologized again.
We started off down the street, walking in silence. Our bodies were only inches away from touching. I was painfully aware that I wasn’t saying anything, and we would be approaching the school soon. I needed to start talking. I needed to tell her I loved her. I opened my mouth, but no words came out. She broke the silence.
“So, Isaac,” she started, “aren’t you excited for our senior year?”
I sighed, and adopted a sarcastic tone, “Oh so excited.”
She giggled, “Come on, it won’t be that bad. You will have all the girls hitting on you, now that you’re all sexy,” she smiled.
I laughed nervously; this was it, time to say it. “I don’t want all the girls hitting on me, though.”
Emily cocked her head, “Why not?”
“Because…never mind.”
I was having second thoughts about telling her. What if she didn’t feel the same? The pangs of rejection would hurt me so much.
“Tell me,” she looked me in the eyes.
It felt as if she was peering into my soul. I had a feeling she already knew why, but Emily’s curiosity knew no bounds. She always needed confirmation for her thoughts.
“Let’s not tug at that thread,” I smiled.
Her voice was quiet and soft, but hit me hard, “I don’t want to tug at that thread. Please, just unravel the truth for me.”
Fuck.
This wasn’t fair. She made me feel guilty. I admired her manipulative abilities, though. She’d make a great interrogator.
She spoke again, “why don’t you want all of the girls hitting on you?
She obviously knew this was serious when I tried to not answer the question.
I thought about lying, but I knew she’d see through it. Emily knew me too well.
“I don’t want the girls at school hitting on me because…I don’t want to be with any of them.”
“…Who do you want to be with?” She asked, pushing the subject. I wished she would just drop it.
I looked at my shoes, and focused on my laces. “You.”
She said nothing. I didn’t want there to be an awkward silence, so I went on. “I had this whole speech thought out in my head, but I can’t remember it anymore.” This was going horribly. “All I can remember is that…is that I love you.”
More awkward silence, then she spoke, “Oh, that complicates things.”
Fuck.
That wasn’t the response I had anticipated.
“Why does it complicate things?” I asked.
That was walking into the proverbial minefield.
“Because, never mind.” She said.
My turn.
“Tell me.”
“Well, I do have feelings for you,” my hoped rose, “but,” the crashed back down, “I have a boyfriend.”
“What?” I asked, confused, “you’ve only been back a week.”
“He asked me out the day I got back. He goes to our school. He’s really sweet and funny, and I really like him.”
“Oh…” I said quietly.
“I’m sorry.” She said again, “I hope we can still be friends.”
“Yeah, of course.”
She smiled weakly, but took a small step farther away from me. It was subtle, but I noticed it.
I hated myself at this moment. Why did I have to wait? Why didn’t I meet her at the airport and tell her then?
We were on school grounds now, and the noise of teens talking and laughing in front of the building.
“I’d like you to meet him,” she said quietly, “I think you two would get along.”
Big mistake.
“Yeah, sure, I bet we’ll be good friends.”
Chapter 2: The First Conflict
Emily told me to meet her in front of the school at lunch. She said she’d bring Jack, her boyfriend, so we could officially meet. I saw her walk out of the school doors, followed by a guy, who I assumed was Jack.
He was my height, with a large nose, small eyes, and a tanned complexion. He looked like he took great pride in his appearance, and he walked with an arrogant air about him that told me I wasn’t going to like him already.
This was not hypocrisy on my part. I was arrogant only with my intelligence, which was justifiable, seeing as my IQ was way above the norm. Jack, however, was arrogant in general. He had a snobby face that screamed, “I’m better than all of you.” With people like him, I’d simply stump them verbally, and knock them off of their pedestals, but I wouldn’t be able to this time. If I was a jerk to her boyfriend, Emily would be mad at me, and I did not want that.
“Isaac, this is Jack,” she motioned towards the guy.
“Hello,” I faked interest, and held out my hand. He didn’t take it.
“Hey,” he replied, not putting as much effort into the greeting as I did.
Emily looked uncomfortably at the two of us. “Oh, man, I forgot my jacket in my locker,” she said, “I’ll be right back.”
“I’ll go with you,” both Jack and I announced at once. We shot each other subtly nasty looks.
“No, I’ll go myself. This will give you two a chance to talk and become friends,” she smiled and left.
I turned to Jack. “So…” I said uncomfortably.
“What’s with you and my girlfriend?” he said suddenly, throwing me off guard.
“She’s my best friend,” I said simply, shrugging.
He paused in thought, “Just don’t mess anything up,” he said threateningly.
He was jealous of me, as I would later come to that conclusion. It was the fact that I was Emily’s best friend. I knew her better than he did. I understood who she was, and how she thought, and Jack was jealous of that understanding. Ironically, I was jealous of him as well. I was jealous of what he had. I was jealous that he had Emily.
“Why would I mess anything up?” I asked innocently.
I wish I could ‘mess things up’.
He looked glared into my eyes. “Just don’t, ok? Or you’ll be sorry.”
I sighed, there was no point arguing with him, “Fine.”
Emily came back, “So, how are you two getting along?”
Jack grinned and gave a friendly, but painful slap on the back, “Isaac and I are getting along great,” he was so full of shit you could smell it.
Emily gave me a glance, and I put on a fake smile. I didn’t want her to think I was jealous. “I think I’m inviting this kid to my birthday party,” I said, but the sarcasm leaked through, and it looked as though Emily caught it. Jake, however, did not.
“Um…yeah,” she smiled weakly at me, “great. I’m glad you two are getting along. It would have upset me a lot,” she looked at me, “if the two most important guys in my life didn’t like each other.”
“Good thing we do, then,” said Jack.
“Good thing, indeed.” I smiled.
This was the first conflict. Minor, I know, but trust me; it’s the kindling for the fire of this tragedy. Jealousy. It’s the green-eyed monster that lurks in all of us. Bringing out our primal traits, is it that bad? Depending on the dose, jealousy can cause behaviors on each end of the spectrum. Jealousy brings forth violence, and loathing when it is too concentrated. But envy is also passion and desire; you want something somebody else has. Whereas my envy was directed towards the desire to have Emily, Jack’s jealousy was a loathing towards me. Love and envy, hand in hand, a lethal combination
